Except, of course, for the British mothers, who had theirs in March. And the French, who have theirs at the end of the month. And the Norwegians who had theirs in February. And the Kenyans (June), Costa Ricans (August), Argentinians (October), and Panamaniacs (December … and that’s what you call someone from Panama, right? A Panamaniac?)

And I could go on. And on. And on. I’m pretty sure that most places don’t celebrate today as Mother’s Day, but it’s the most popular of the bunch, and I’m Canadian, and it’s Canadian Mother’s Day. So that’s good enough.

Here are three of my favourite Canadian mothers:

Things appear to have gone well. Also, my wife is pretty.

Later? Bloopers.

If not, you probably remember it as the day Wikipedia went on strike.

The campaign against it – culminating in an “Internet blackout” which featured sites such as Wikipedia – lead to the abandonment of the legislation, meaning that we can all continue to include external hyperlinks on our own sites, without fear of being blacklisted in America.

But what of consequences? An elected politician – Lamar Smith (R-TX) – actually introduced this legislation, and tried to push it through without debate. It’s difficult to see this as anything other than a betrayal of the people he is purported to represent. How can he be held to account?

The answer, of course, is to block his re-election. It so happens that there is a Republican primary occurring on May 29th in Texas.

You may be able to vote in the primary. (I can’t – I’m neither American, nor in Texas.)
You may be able to vote in the election. (I can’t – I’m neither American, nor in Texas.)
And you may be able to donate to the campaign to defeat Lamar Smith. (I can’t – I’m not American.)

So if you’re a Texan, an American, or in possession of a green card (in which case it’s apparently OK to contribute to political campaigns), the Big Bad Blog encourages you to vote with your wallet and/or your, um, votes.

For me, this plea is all that’s allowed.

The legislation failed, but legislation fails all the time – there are no consequences to it. SOPA deserves consequences. Please help deliver them.

I have penned the following reply, but not sent it as of yet. I now debate bridges burned versus self satisfaction …

Dear [REDACTED],

Unfortunately, your email does not find me entirely well – I have a slight cold.

Despite this unfortunate state, I have anyways decided to respond to your email. Not because the roles you list below are at all interesting or pertinent – indeed, they leave me only with the impression that you approach your role as a recruitment consultant with a “spray and pray” approach, which I find disappointing both as a potential jobseeker and a hiring manager – but because I am concerned that you don’t understand what you’re saying.

The title of your email begins with the word “urgent”. This word is in all capital letters, which is typing for I’M SHOUTING RIGHT NOW. So you are beginning by shouting the word “urgent” at me.

This follows with the words “please respond”. Which would be fine if you were actually interested in my response, but as you are (quite clearly) taking a “spray and pray” approach, it seems doubtful that you actually hope for a high response rate amongst those to whom you are sending this email.

The final phrase in your message title is “actuarial contract opportunities”. This is the point at which it becomes clear that you have never, ever, for even a second, glanced at my CV. I have no qualifications as an actuary, because I have never sought such a qualification. I have had two roles – both over five years ago – in which the word “actuarial” features in the job title or department.

As such, I am declining to inform you about my availability or current situation. I expect people paid to match job candidates to roles (and vice versa) to have some skill in this area. While I am uncertain whether your email represents a lack of skill in this area, or merely a poor work ethic on your part, the answer does not really matter.

Unimpressed, I remain,
Mr. Topp

BMW. Our motorcycles are sexy. Maybe too sexy. (Results may vary).

You’re welcome, BMW. I await my cheque.

(In related news, the TSA is concerned that there may be an anomaly in your crotch area.)

As is his wont, he has decided to go through the candidates, and openly muse about why he should (or shouldn’t) vote for them.

We began this in part one, last week, with an intention to follow with parts two and three. But we ran into a problem: time and space.

After writing about Boris, we found ourselves with over 1,000 words (and not happy with the result). That still left two candidates. With obligations eating into our time, a deadline of election day (tomorrow), and other decisions that need to be made about tomorrow’s vote … well, we are revisiting our approach.

Here are our choices for mayor, ranked, with the reason for the ranking.

#1: Brian Paddick, Liberal Democrat.

The performance of the Liberal Democrat party as part of a coalition government has left me rather cold to casting votes in their favour. But, as described last week in Part 1, I am quite impressed with Paddick’s position, leaving him in top spot.

#2: Siobhan Benita, Independent.

Benita has some good ideas, but I remain unconvinced that she has the ability to actually make them a reality once in office. Her plans extend well beyond the mayor’s remit, and I have doubts about her ability to actually achieve what is laid out in her manifesto should she be elected.

#3 Ken Livingstone, Labour.

Ken, of course, was the mayor of London for two terms (2000-2008), and prior to that had served as the leader of the Greater London Council. Ken cares about the city. He has accomplished some fantastic things as mayor, particularly around public transport.

Of course, he has also had his share of missteps and controversy. I’m not sure I particularly like Ken.

#4 Boris Johnson, Conservative.

The incumbent, I have previously written (and deleted) 1,000 words on Boris’s campaign.

It comes down to this: Boris is running on his record, but he has done (almost) nothing during his time as mayor. He promises to do (pretty much) a further nothing for the next four years. It’s impressive that he manages to stretch that nothing into a nine-point plan, and a massive manifesto.

He is not a bad mayor, but he is not a good mayor. It seems to be more of a platform to give him visibility and exposure before an eventual bid for the Conservative Party leadership. One gets a sense the man is biding his time.

Between incumbency, competence, and being the only real right wing choice available (see below), Boris is probably back for a second term.

#5 Jenny Jones, Green Party.

My opinion of Jenny Jones, Green Party candidate for mayor, was built from a short conversation witnessed on Twitter. Being asked her opinion on science, and its impact on government policy, Ms. Jones replied that she was a big fan of science. Her opposition to genetically modified food, she continued, was based on her own study of ancient plant life.

The belief that knowledge of ancient plant life provides understanding of the crossroads of farming and genetic research in the twenty-first century would be a worrying trait in a mayor. This inablity to recognise the limits of her own knowledge reveals that she cannot be trusted with office. The mayor has to be able to know when they have reached their own limits, and seek advice. They then have to be able to judge the quality of that advice.

At #5 on our list, Ms. Jones is the first candidate who we believe would actually be a bad mayor.

#6 Lawrence Webb, UKIP.

Mr. Webb and the UKIP released a one page manifesto. Seriously. It’s shorter than this article. It’s in point form. Anybody who votes UKIP in the London election needs to have their head examined.

Last: Carlos Cortiglia, BNP.

Mr. Cortiglia probably has a more developed plan than Mr. Webb does, but given that he represents the BNP, I will not do him the favour of giving it any page views. I am not searching for it, linking to it, or typing the url in browser.

How will we vote?

You might think this answer is above – we have Mr. Paddick first, through to Mr. Webb in 6th. All ranked.

But voting for the mayor is more complicated — we get a first choice, and a second choice. And the strategy begins.

Idealism VS Realism

Our first thought is for our second vote.

In an ideal world, our second vote would clearly be for Ms. Benita — she is our #2 choice, and if Mr. Paddick is not crowned the winner when the votes are tabulated, Ms. Benita is our next candidate.

But in the real world, everybody in London knows that the next mayor will either be Boris Johnson or Ken Livingstone. Having a second vote – and no more – creates the temptation to jump Ms. Benita in the queue, and vote for my preferred candidate amongst the two likely candidates, giving the nod to Mr. Livingstone.

Here lies the quandary.

This evening, I’m leaning towards being realistic. London will be better under Livingstone than it would be with a second Johnson term; I have the power to affect that. On the other hand, it irks me that I have to rank my third choice second.

Wishful thinking VS Wishful thinking

Having chosen my second vote, it is time to pick who comes first.

My first, last and only thought had been that it would be Mr. Paddick. I like his platform best of the candidates, and am willing to look past his unfortunate reality television shenanigans and the party he represents. I see him as being best of the bunch.

And then I read the how and why of a friend’s vote, and I must admit it strikes a chord. If my real vote, the one that counts, is for Ken Livingstone, then what is my first preference?

For Mr. O’Malley, the answer is the hope that people see a large number of Green votes, and think they need more Green Party-like policies to appeal to voters like him. He doesn’t have to worry about Ms. Jones’s ability to do the job, because she will never have the opportunity to do it.

So I now have two options for my first vote.

On one hand, I can list Mr. Paddick. The wishful thinking here is that something crazy happens and Paddick manages to win. That’s very much wishful thinking, as he is currently polling in fourth place, with 5% of the vote.

On the other hand, I can list Ms. Jones, despite the fact that she is my #5 choice, and I believe her not to be competent. She’d be a horrible mayor. And I can engage in the wishful thinking that her estimated 6% of the vote will somehow influence more mainstream politics.

This evening, I stand by the principle that my #1 vote should be applied to the person I think will be best in the role, but if I wake up tomorrow, dreamy-eyed and believing that a vote for Green will plant an environmental seed in some dirty capitalist or unionist heart, that could change.

It’s mostly useless.

I see comments I’ve left around the net, and my own blog posts. Yay me?

Recently, it has been even less than useless, as one Brian Topp had been in the running for the leadership of Canada’s official opposition party, the NDP. Platforms aside – because I don’t know them – it made me grateful that Mr. Topp lost that particular election. Were he the leader of the official opposition, I would have just had to delete the alerts.

But Mr. Mulcair won, so all is well in the world, which apparently revolves around my Google Alerts.

But I digress.

Last week, Google Alerts sent me an email that “Mr. Topp” was being mentioned on the Internet. And it wasn’t my blog. And it wasn’t about the New Democratic Party of Canada. It was from a blog called tiddlyompompom.

It said this:

Wednesday, 3.30 am

Little M: Muhmeeee! Muhmeee! MUHMEEEEE!

Me: Nggggggggggg

Mr TOPP: Nggggggggg

Wednesday, 4.37 am

Little M: Muhmeeee! Muhmeee! MUHMEEEEE!

Me: Nggggggggggg

Mr TOPP: Nggggggggg

Wednesday, 5.27am

Little M: Muhmeeee! Muhmeee! MUHMEEEEE!

Me: Nggggggggggg

Mr TOPP: Nggggggggg

Wednesday, 7am

Mr TOPP: Little M, time to wake up…

Little M: Ngggggggg! No.

Now, I’m Mr. Topp. I have a daughter who has a name that begins with “M”. She is little. These scenes could easily be taken from the Topp household. All that needs to be true is that the role of “Me” is played by Karen.

And so I must wonder: Does my wife have a secret blog?

I choose to believe yes.

Sure, some details in other posts are clearly way, way, way off of my life. Including the pictures. But that’s probably just to throw me off the trail. Karen: I know it’s you. I’m on to you. And I’m revealing your dirty little secret mummy blog!

The concept is simple:
Every day, take a photo of Maggie.
Every day, post a photo of Maggie to my Flickr stream.

Here is today’s photo:

Here at the Big Bad Blog, we are trying to figure out what to make of this.

Is this a rousing success? That I’m still posting photos of Maggie nearly every day, eighteen months later?

Or does the fact that there are four months – over 120 days – between today’s date and the most recent Maggie-A-Day photograph constitute an embarrassing failure?

I choose the former; this is a project for which the delivery schedule is unimportant. It is creating a slideshow of beautiful moments from my daughter’s life, to look back on whenever I want a fit of nostalgia (or when she does). And the latter leaves me abandoning the project after documenting little over the first year of her life.

But I do need to remind myself of that; it is a qualified success. And it neither looks nor feels like a good omen for my creative reset. Things have been moving however. In the last half of April I have:

• Bought a new lens – nothing brings out the urge to play with my camera like new kit.
• Enrolled in the Photocritic Photography School
• Decided on my May “planned photograph” – Karen needs professional (or indistinguishable-from-professional-amateur) photos of herself for her business

All in all, a good start — I’m set for the first full month of my creative reset in May. I have a course to learn from, and a photograph to take.

And, of course, another month of daily Maggie sightings.

Catz.

As is his wont, he has decided to go through the candidates, and openly muse about why he should (or shouldn’t) vote for them. Given the number of candidates, it seems as though we’re going to do this in three parts; we will endeavour to cover all candidates prior to the election.

So, in the order presented in the pamphlet provided by London Elects, here are the candidates to be the Mayor of London:

Lawrence Webb, UKIP

I don’t know much about the UKIP, other than that “UKIP” stands for “United Kingdom Independence Party”, and that they’re a conservative party that would like the country to exit the EU. The Mayor of London has no say in such matters, of course, so — other than a feather in their cap, of course — there’s no obvious UKIP policy that fits with the power of the mayorality.

So what does their manifesto contain?

Immigration Policy

Amazingly, since it lies outside of the mayor’s power (although perhaps not surprisingly, given it’s the purpose of their party) the thrust of their point-form manifesto, is an anti-EU and anti-immigration policy. (Really. A one page, point form, manifesto. I’m embarrassed for them.)

Their anti-immigration stance has even evolved into some sort of generic anti-movement policy, separating “long term Londoners” from the rest.

This list includes things beyond the mayor’s power (changing immigration policy, altering EU policy to eliminate red tape), the illegal (giving preferential treatment to people from London on the job market), the weird (levy 25p on all overseas visitors), and the immoral (giving preference to Londoners over asylum seekers for housing).

Law and order?

Webb seems intent to undermine the police and justice system through his “Law and Order” proposals:

1. Zero tolerance on certain types of crime. Leaving aside that zero tolerance policies do not work and pervert the course of justice, the line “offend on Saturday, face court on Monday” strikes me as impossible.
2. Encourage citizens arrests.

The good idea

Every campaign needs a good idea, right? For Webb, it’s the time-limited multi-bus trip: as many bus trips as a person wants/needs within 70 minutes of the ticket’s purchase.

The caveat is that this appears to have simply been stolen from the Liberal Democrat platform (see below). So, um, the only thing I like about the UKIP platform is the bit they stole from the Lib Dems.

Why you should vote for Webb

You shouldn’t.

London is a global financial capital — immigration is its lifeblood. An anti-immigration mayor, even a powerless one, would do irreparable economic harm to the city and the country.

The immigration issue aside (if that’s possible with the UKIP), Webb’s ideas seem pretty awful. The one page manifesto is an embarrassment; any serious candidate who wants your vote should put some effort into their campaign.

Even if you find yourself agreeing with the UKIP and Mr. Webb, the poor showing on the manifesto shows that he is not serious about the role; he does not deserve a single vote.

Carlos Cortiglia, BNP

The BNP (British National Party) are a far right party of racists and bigots.

There is no reason to examine the Cortiglia’s platform.

Do not vote for this man.

Siobhan Benita, Independent

My dissatisfaction with the mainstream parties (see below) makes an independent candidate intriguing. An independent needs more vetting, however, as their unstated political views are not necessarily clear based on party alignment, and their track record may be absent.

Such is the case with Ms. Benita, who has an About Page that is worryingly absent of content.

Still, after reading the UKIP’s “manifesto”, Benita is a breath of fresh air. She has a separate manifesto for each of her policy areas, any of which put the UKIP manifesto to shame.

Ms. Benita appears to be prepared, and has some interesting ideas.

Why you should vote for Benita

Other candidates seem rather lackluster (see above and below), which is a poor reason, but a reason all the same. She also has well thought out positions that I happen to agree with:

Education appears to be her primary concern, and she wants to bring libraries under the mayorality. I am on board with these — although concerned that her primary agenda appears to deal with subjects that are outside the purview of the mayor.

Given the new rules for academies brought about at the national level, to have the mayor responsible for planning permissions for new schools, while the councils are responsible for education itself seems like a strange mismatch (of course, Conservatives probably see it as “competition”, and won’t change the rules here). Throw in the fact that the mayor is a visible force in the city, while most people do not know who represents them on the council, and it would create greater accountability for a primary concern in local elections.

Other fantastic ideas:

• Free transport for job seekers
• Having the tubes run later on weekends
• Better river transport services
• Donate government buildings to charities after working hours

Beyond this, we are also rather fond of her entire Housing Manifesto.

Why you should not vote for Benita

A lot of the mayor’s “powers” are not powers, but places where they wield influence. This is done – as far as I can tell – through will and personality. When I watch Benita talk (and that’s a video from her campaign website, not something random I chose in which she is uncompelling), I’m not convinced that she can convince people. When I read about her accomplishments as a senior bureaucrat, I find them to be suspiciously vague.

She has no track record, and there’s no reason to think that she’ll be able to push through anything on …

… education, which is the focus – “priority”, in her words – of her campaign, despite it being outside the remit of mayor.
… economic growth, which is one of the mayor’s responsibilities, but one in which she has no official powers.
… improve policing, where the mayor has many powers, but is not involved in operational decision making.

With her top priority being outside the scope of the job, an absent track record, and no opportunity to see her in action under pressure (as an independent, she is not invited to the debates), she seems to be a “high risk, high reward” candidate.

I like what she’s selling, but remain quite unconvinced that she can deliver any of it.

Brian Paddick, Liberal Democrat

At the moment, I am not a big fan of the Liberal Democrats. I was quite excited about them in the last General Election, and thought quite highly of the prospects of a coalition government that featured them. Unfortunately, they seem to have instead agreed to support the Conservative party – thereby losing their progressive voting base – in return for a referendum on AV that they lost, at least partially, by mismanaging the campaign.

It has not been impressive.

But local politics and national politics are quite different, and when it comes to the position of mayor the person matters even more. The mayor does not answer to the party whip. And Brian Paddick is a very interesting candidate.

His Lib Dem affiliation paints him as a progressive candidate, but he comes from a policing background which, to my mind, tends to produce more right wing types.

His number one focus, naturally, is the police. With his mix of the progressive and the practical, he makes a quite intriguing figure as the person in charge of the Met.

Why you should vote for Paddick

First and foremost, because of his position on policing. Too often those who make “improvements” to policing – who provide more money, more manpower, more tools – are hardline right wingers. A progressive with practical experience approaching such a role is a rare and wonderful thing.

There are other nice ideas in the manifesto — the one-hour bus fare supported by the UKIP also appears here, along with other ideas to make travel in London more affordable to those on a limited income. There are also some good longer-term environmental goals

Why you shouldn’t vote for Paddick

That Lib Dem association again. While the policing focus – along with the clearly well thought out practical ideas – is all Paddick, the manifesto is decidedly about the Liberal Democrats, and not Paddick himself.

How much does he care about these things? How committed to them is he? And – given my reservations about the party itself, these days, is there enough Paddick here to hold my nose and vote for his party?

Stay tuned …

There are still three candidates — including the two favourites — still to come. Keep an eye on the Big Bad Blog for more of our election preview.