We just now realised that this is a Friday the 13th. We apologise for the lack of gore in today’s morning coffee. We should have planned ahead. Instead, we realise this only after having picked out an entirely gore-free Friday coffee.

In news that everybody has already doubtlessly already seen, but for which we would feel remiss should it not appear in this space, Steven Slater knows how to quit a job.

(Hobbiton, once the pride of New Zealand the Shire, is now overrun with sheep.)

I am so happy that Edgar Allan Poe has joined twitter: I have stared with dread into the craggy sockets of the abyss & marveled at its resemblance to Facebook.

More on how your initials impact your life. Children who have a first name that start with an “A” have a tendency to outperform those with a first initial “D” in school. The theory is that we live up to our initials. We will experiment with this for my baby. She will have awesome initials. FAST, and encourage her to be a runner? LOOT, and encourage her to be a bank robber? We will see.

Do you have an iPhone 4? Are you left handed? Having signal problems? Well, it could be worse — you could be allergic to the device.

(A portrait of the droid C3PO, by Greg Peltz.)

As a fencer, I have a bit of an affinity for duels. But I have read of no greater duel than that between Baron Eberhard and a Spaniard, in which the winner had to successfully wrestle the loser into a bag.

What could possibly follow such a duel? A scuba diving dachshund, of course.

A German man has married his cat. Or at least hired an actress to preside over a fake wedding with his cat. At least it’s not dogs marrying cats, right?

(Another fantastic photo FFFfound here, but with no credit.)

Does your bank (or some other service provider) require you to provide them with secret questions and answers? If so, we suggest you have some fun with it.

An interesting (if long) article: How our brains make memories.

I think that this Pikachu ski mask might be the most frightening thing I have ever seen. Which may mean that I need one.

(Photo by Tech. Sergeant Russell E. Cooley IV)

This morning, a new blog has been stumbled upon. Called My Parents Were Awesome, it endeavours to catch your parents, my parents, everyone’s parents back when they were younger and awesomer. It, unfortunately, fails to realise that your parents, my parents, and most parents continue to be awesome today.

To all parents telling their kids it’s bath time: Dirt only makes your children stronger. How do we know this? Science.