We have reached the 25th of November, and as promised I have styled my mustache in the manner that has attracted the most money to my fundraising:

The American Standard

It was a narrow win for the American Standard, which was locked in a dead heat with the dastardly Snidely Whiplash. While tied for cash contributions, the Standard had a plethora of advantages:

• The donors for the Whiplash did not use my MoSpace, making it seem a bit unseemly for the Snidely to overtake the Standard.
• American Standard money was donated by UK taxpayers, meaning that “gift aid” ought to have been added, and the amount raised by the style is actually larger than that raised by the Whiplash.
• The Standard was sponsored by Karen, who must live with the end product.

Those who suggested other awesome styles — you should have put your money where your mouth is!

In unfortunate (but related) news, our reason for choosing today as our deadline is no more. The deadline was chosen due to the scheduling of London’s Movember Gala Party, being held this evening in beautiful Battersea.

Alas, the fates have intervened in the form of the dreaded ear-infection-in-small-child. So rather than wow-ing other, less hirsute Mo Bros in Battersea, my mustache instead battles the dreaded burst eardrum, using a mix of drops, Calpol and Amoxicillin. I suppose it’s a proper Dad-’stache.

But never fear! The mighty mustache has reared its head, and while it might be engaged in less stylish activities than previously planned, it still fights cancer.

And November isn’t over, so it’s not too late to donate. Just click the link, support the ‘tache, and fight some cancer.

My face is now the home of sixteen days’ worth of hair growth. It is, you might say, hirsute.

Why is it so hairy, you might ask?

Part of the answer lies in genetics. The other part is to fight cancer. In nine days, I will shave it down to a mustache — the exact style of which is still available for purchase. This mustache will exist solely to fight cancer.

Like some kind of superhero.

Some prospective donors have found that the UK donation site does not work for them. Never fear! You can donate through many different avenues – to cover off the countries that visit my blog most often:

• My American donation site
• My Australian donation site
• My British donation site
• My Canadian donation site
• My Czech donation site

And yes, The Big Bad Blog is apparently popular in the Czech Republic. I was really expecting to see France or Germany there.

When you leave your donation, please leave a note with your suggestion for my mustache style — the style that has raised the most money by 5:00 am GMT on November 25th will be my Movember style for 2011, and I will wear it for the last week of the year.

At present, we have a two way tie for the lead – between The American Standard and the Snidely Whiplash …

Narwhal illustration part of the Manly Moustaches of the Animal Kingdom set, by Jason Sweeney.

Here we are, a week into November. And your faithful blogger has yet to shave — as promised a week ago, I am participating in that great practice known as Movember, to raise money and awareness to fight cancer.

Which means that I am growing a mustache.

In what style?, you might ask.
Any style you want, would come the answer.

Indeed, if you hate cancer and/or would like to suggest to me a mustache style, just follow these easy steps:

1. Visit my Movember page.
2. Donate some money
3. Leave a comment, indicating the style of mustache you would like to see.

The third step is, of course, optional. It is not necessary to vote.

On November 25th, I will style my bountiful facial hair into the nearest approximation of said style as possible. And wear it proudly until November 30th.

Currently in the lead is the American Standard:

If you would like to save me from looking like a porn star for a week, or have something even more embarrassing in mind, make a donation and be heard.

In the meantime, I leave you with two images — the first shows my hair growth, so far. The second, a past mustache, to give you an idea of exactly how capable I am of being a mustachioed gentleman.

Mario image found at Fubiz.Net, originating at Moustaches Make a Difference.
The photo of the American Standard is taken from Cracked.com, who clearly took it from a pornographic film set.
Other photos are of, and by, Mr. Topp.

There’s this photo of me going around the Internet — if you’re actually reading this at the Big Bad Blog, you can see it in couple of places on your screen. If you’re using one of those new-fangled RSS readers, you have still likely seen it before. Because, for the last eleven months, I have used it as my profile picture, everywhere on the Internet.

It looks a little like this:

This photo was taken at the end of November last year, showing off my participation in what is known as Movember.

During November each year, Movember is responsible for the sprouting of moustaches on thousands of men’s faces in the UK and around the world. The aim of which is to raise vital funds and awareness for men’s health, specifically prostate cancer and other cancers that affect men.

-Movember

Last year, I solicited a rather … modest volume of donations. I blame this on two main factors:

• Late entry
• Poor marketing

This year, there are no such excuses. It is the evening of October 31st — six minutes until midnight, where I am, as I write — and I have just shaved. This is my newly photographed face:

As all Movember-bros are wont to do, I will be growing my facial hair over the coming weeks, and am seeking your donations to support my mustache and fight cancer.

That’s a win-win situation, if ever there was one …

But wait. There’s more.

There’s more?

Yes, there’s more.

Unique, perhaps, amongst Movember Bros, I will be letting you, dear readers, choose my mustache.

After you donate, you will be prompted to leave a comment — please tell me what style of mustache you would like in the comments, and, on November 25th I will:

• Style my mustache in the manner that has raised the most money.
• Attend the Movember Gala in London wearing said styled mustache.

So long as the winning mustache is not in the style of one Charlie Chaplin, I will also:

• Post a photo of myself, right here on the Internet, with the winning mustache.
• Wear said mustache style until the 30th of November.

A few caveats:

• A mustache connected to sideburns is a beard; such votes are disqualified.
• A mustache connected to chin hair is a goatee; such votes are disqualified.
• In the event that votes are unclear, or attempt to use a voting system other than First Past The Post, Mr. Topp has the freedom to interpret the vote in any way he chooses.

How to vote

1. Visit my Movember page, and donate.
2. After donating, you will be asked to leave a comment – tell me the style you would like me to wear.
3. Vote early and vote often — your choice will be counted once for every £1 you have donated.

Mustaches, away!

Last image is The Ballet of Mustache, and can be bought as a print at Etsy.
First two are of my face. You can buy them as prints, as well, just let me know. Weirdo.