The following clip is a (safer-for-work than the Big Bad Blog) trailer for a Star Trek porn parody.
So it’s a New Year, and plenty of people are now out there trying to get in shape. But if you’re running, should you run while wearing shoes, or go barefoot? While there is no evidence either way to tell us which is better, here at the Big Bad Blog, we suggest going barefoot while running outdoors in winter.
Because we’re cruel.
(If you do decide to run barefoot, these footstickers could be useful. Or not. We haven’t tried them.)
Prosthetic limbs are often made to resemble the real thing … but wouldn’t a tentacle be better?
Here in the UK there is a plot afoot to censor pornography on the Internet. As with most expensive, moronic, untenable propositions, it is being trotted out with the line “think of the children”. Here at the Big Bad Blog, we are capable of parenting without government censorship, thanks.
Also, isn’t this one of those socially conservative initiatives that a coalition with the Liberal Democrats were supposed to prevent?
The in-laws arrived yesterday. My last day of work for the year is tomorrow. And that can only mean one thing: It’s time to stop posting regularly to the Big Bad Blog, and start to investigate what the Best of the Big Bad Blog was for the year 2010.
We begin today with your top five search terms, comparing to their position last year.
Chuck is one of our favourite TV shows here at the Big Bad Blog, and Sarah is one of the lead characters in Chuck.
And, I suppose, sex-crazed Internet weirdos want to know more about her.
Back in October of 2009, I wrote a Big Bad Blog article titled apparently the Internet needs more naked Felicia Day.
I wrote the article because a couple of mentions of Ms. Day on this website had led to an avalanche of people reaching the Big Bad Blog in a search for pictorial representations of her breasts. The thought was, if the closest they could get was mention of Ms. Day as a dirty fairy alongside mention of Saved by the Bell pornography, there is indeed a demand for such photographs.
For some reason, putting the words “naked Felicia Day” together on the blog has not reduced the number of such searches that reach us here. The traffic from such people is fairly regular.
We have posted several photos of volcanoes erupting here on the Big Bad Blog. They tend to look quite pretty.
Combine that with the Eyjafjallajökull eruption earlier this year, and it is understandable that volcanic eruptions make the list.
Tattoos sit in the second spot in the Big Bad Blog’s list, and we are surprised.
Not that it’s so high — we ‘write’ about tattoos a lot — but that it is so low. The daily report of top search terms reaching the blog is usually crammed with tattoo variants, and this shows in the annual stats. In the top twelve search terms leading to the Big Bad Blog, over half of them include the word tattoo: “bird tattoo”, “bad tattoo”, “weird tattoo”, “star wars tattoo”, “hello kitty tattoo”, and “origami tattoo” are all there.
And let us not forget the word “tattoo”.
So thank you tattoo lovers. I’ll keep occasionally posting them, if you keep coming.
But tattoos are blown away by the most popular search term for the blog: Origami.
The search term “origami”, by itself, is about equal to all those tattoo results in the top twelve. But if one then considers that the terms “origami unicorn” and the all-powerful “origami tattoo” also find themselves in that list, it pushes Origami to the top of the list this year.
Warning: Today’s morning coffee might not be appropriate for all workplaces. If it’s not appropriate for yours, find a new job.
Of course, if you are a regular watcher of porn you probably already knew we would be writing about porn today, thanks to your pornography-powered ESP.
While on the subject of fellatio, we have discussed bat blowjobs previously on the Morning Coffee. Now the aftermath: Discussing bat fellatio is considered sexual harassment, but is not serious enough to warrant counselling.
For those of you who are now saddened that blowjobs are off the menu (due to cannibalism) and off the workplace-discussion-topic-list (at least where bats are concerned) … at least you can still control video games with your penis.