Nine days to SMASH!

Nine days from now, I’m going to smash it at the London Marathon. Who knows how fast I’ll be – I’ve only run the distance once, without a goddamn mock WWII fighter helmet on my head – but I’ll smash it all the same.

But I need your help.

Because while I’m ready for the running, I’ve still got a way to go on the fundraising:

So let’s make a final nine day push!

Deal #1: If you donate between now and the start of the race (10:00 BST on 23 April 2017), I will match your donation.

Deal #2: If you donate between now and the start of the race, and give a time that you expect me to finish in, I will pay you back if you’re right.

Now, these aren’t limitless offers. For deal #1, I’ll need to tap out after £500 of donation matching. But YOU SHOULD MAKE ME TAP OUT. Channel your inner Ultimate Fighting Champion, and give to charity until I tap out.

For deal #2, you have to have the closest guess AND be within 5 minutes of my time. Tie goes to the optimist who thinks I will be faster. Still tied goes to the person who guessed the time first.

For guidance, I’ve run half marathon distances twice, in 1h46m, and 1h48m. I’ve run a full marathon distance only once, in 4h40m. None of these were run in a pilots cap, or with 40,000 other people. The full marathon distance was very non-race-like, including stops to take selfies with deer in Richmond Park.

There we are. Donate here. Let’s smash it.

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